Friday, January 16, 2009

Painting




I sold my first painting for 200 bucks when I was a senior in high school.  I felt as if I was selling a little piece of my soul. When I decided to stay in LA, I decided to bring my art with me and try to sell  it. I packed  my favorite pieces into a huge portfolio, put it in a box with bubble wrap, ducked taped that baby shut and then prayed over it before I put it on the plane. Know where that portfolio is now? 
Under my bed.
Know where the art from that portfolio is?
On my walls.
I almost just can't bear to give them  up. They each have a history. I remember creating each of them. I remember the way the sun felt or the rain smelt on days when I finished a piece I was proud of. I remember walking quietly through our art department with my paint covered ipod, paint covered hands, carrying my oversized canvas'  and my fingertips dancing with anticipation to hang up and stand back and see what had come out of my messy red haired hippie mind.
I haven't done anything with my art since I have been in LA. quite a shame...
I read this quote tonight...
"It's not your painting anymore. It stopped being your painting the moment you finished it"
I just stared at the quote and thought, "Wow. He is right."
Its like...I paint these painting and at the time they are all representing something to me that is fighting to get out somehow. Once it is out, the painting needs to inspire someone else.
I need to get my art out and I need to start painting again.
Why do we sometimes let our passions take the back seat?
Why do we put them in drawers, tuck them away safely and then not return for them?

I want to use my passion not have a drawer full of paint brushes.
so I think I shall.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is this an advertisement 4 ur art???? I'm buggying u. Really though, I feel you. I've sold some of pictures, it's nice because I can buy more camer equipment. But it is emotionally difficult to let it go. Even worse, I've taken pictures for people and they want to edit them, they don't understand, it's mine. An example, I took some engagement pictures for some good friends. They wanted to make a book with the pix. I offered to do it. They decided to do it themselves. When I saw the book at theo wedding, I almost had an emotional breakdown. Worse yet, when ppl asked they would tell them I took the pictures. I was horror stricken. While pictures don't take as much of your soul as a painting or a song it stilll a piece of you. I found a solution so that I don't part with them, I take them stuck them on the computer. I don't print or show them. Am I being selfish, or is it that I don't want to sell my soul piece by piece.

Shannon Rae said...

I totally understand. Everyone is trying to convince me to sell my stuff online and but what if someone crazy buys it and destroys it? Or decides to paint over it or something?

We should get a room at the dream center just for all the art and photography we should be selling but can't part with :)